Gein's Revival

Yep, something in the beer in this state:

LANCASTER, Wis. (AP) -- An attorney for a 23-year-old man accused of trying to dig up a dead woman in Cassville to have sex with her says his client only wanted to wanted to pose her in a "non-sexual way."

In opening statements, defense attorney Suzanne Edwards described Nicholas Grunke as a shy virgin who longed to have a girlfriend. When a 20-year-old woman died in a 2006 motorcycle crash, Edwards says Grunke wanted to "set up a little fairy-tale scenario."

Grunke is accused of attempted third-degree sexual assault, attempted criminal damage to a cemetery and attempted misdemeanor theft.

Prosecutor Tony Pozorski argued that Grunke intended to have sex with the body.

Pozorski argued that Grunke, his twin brother Alexander, and friend Dustin Radke were involved in the alleged scheme. The prosecutor says a van found near the scene contained shovels, a wrecking bar and a box of condoms.

Pop! Goes the Fetishist

Some people have interesting desires:

A Duluth man with a history of burglary to satisfy a self-professed sexual fetish for slashing large rubber exercise balls has been at it again, according to a complaint made public on Thursday.

I guess he was going for the double pop:

Court documents in the earlier cases indicate that Bjerkness told Duluth police he slashed the rubber balls to satisfy a sexual urge. He said he popped some of them with his hands. Experts in the field said that Bjerkness has a fetish or unusual attraction to inflatable exercise devices.

'tis But A Scratch!

So my right pinky is only sprained, not broken. I saw a sports medicine guy who plays rugby and he gave me some padding to put between my fingers.

So Oshkosh Pigfest is a go.

Facebook Stalking

So I've had some weird dreams lately full of people I've known from my past. It got me to thinking what I could have done if I wasn't consumed with anxiety while growing up.

Enter Facebook Stalking.

Although I'm not openly on Facebook, I created a profile for just these occasions. So I looked the pictures off all of those people from my past and realized that my life has ended up ok as I'm not 400 pounds, putting Sears Photo Studio pictures of my kids online, and generally looking like I'm waiting around until my kids graduate so I can get back to my life in the suburbs.

Yes, Virginia, there are fates worse than death.

The 5th Wheel

I was a bit extraneous tonight. That shit gets old

I Feel Mad, Damnit!

Actually, this is one of my favorite vintage Sesame Street cartoons. It makes me not mad: