Insurance Claim

A couple came to test drive my car. Everything went well and they were considering buying it. I needed to take it somewhere and jumped in to head out. The car wouldn't turn over, but it did start rolling down the hill. The steering kind of worked, but the brakes wouldn't. Then I remembered I didn't renew my subscription for features as I didn't need them and I was selling it anyway. So down the hill I rolled, maneuvering around cars as I sped up. Another car was ahead of me towards the end of the hill, but two semis were coming side by side on a residential street. I crashed into the car, but they drove off. I turned my car and for somehow it started rolling back up the hill. I made it back to my house and the car lost momentum and stopped. Pierce Brosnan came out the door and started spreading weeds and seeds all over my large vegetable garden. I told him what happend and he told me tough shit.

Charlie with Charlie Sheen

A lot of last night's dream is jumbled, but the clearest part was me trying to convince Charlie Sheen to take better care of himself. He snorted a bunch of coke anyway and I was riding shotgun in his Land Rover. He nodded out and the truck went off the road and over a lot of bumps. I think I yelled at him and then stormed off.

A Whirlwind

My dreams last night where very vivid, but I can't remember most of it now. As follows:

• I was a partisan for the socialists in the Spanish Civil War and helped instigate it. It took place on two city blocks that were enclosed in a warehouse. I tried to flee to Argentina, which was through an opening) but stayed until we won. I stabbed a guy in the gut at his request.
• I was in some school and don't remember much.
• I was with my rugby team at work in the shop. The shop was enormous and my father's old partner was leading us. I remember arguing with him.
• Then I was attacking people on a suburban street that ended in a mall entrance. I threatened them with a sawed-off shotgun. I only had two shells left. I did shoot two people that tried to leave and then a dog someone sent upon me. I climbed a fence with one strand of barbed wire on it.

Can't say I remember anything else.

A Head Cold Makes Vivid Dreams

The last couple of nights have produced vivid dreams with my friends helping me out. Wednesday night, Michael and Shari helped me out with something. The dream stuck with me all day, but I can't remember it right now. Last night's dream had me on the Isthmus with Kyle and Nancy. They were very picky about where they parked. The cool thing was they helped me tote around my newly bought goats. I had three, but couldn't keep them all in the city, so I gave up two to some goat rescue in the county. The one I kept I called Old Scratch. That was pretty awesome.

In Trouble

First I remember Shari throwing a grenade into a building across the street and it imploded.

Then I was crossing the border from Canada into the US and was pulled aside.  I had a bunch of crap in my car.  The contraband kept changing and was gold bars at one point.  Somehow I made it through.

Can't remember much more.

Burning Down the House

This will be a bit incoherent... wait, all my dreams are incoherent.

I was in East Towne Mall except that Jacob's Field was there.  The entrance had wood paneling and old furniture.  My cousin was there, too.  For some reason, a few of us decided to burn it down.

Then I was in there with old clocks, chairs, and tables.  This part is a bit fuzzy, but I know we trashed a room and piled the furniture together.

Then I was back in East Towne and it had something to do with a Stephen King novel, one he didn't write in real life.  It had demons and such.  Then I was running from some robot with other robots.  Then another clock was there and some store display in the middle of the mall.  I can't decipher much except an Asian woman help me escape.

Off to South America

This dream is a bit muddled, but it started at the park where I played my little league games. My game was in what looked like a dugout (just not dugout) with a roof and all. The whole game was played in there and our pitcher was terrible. The other team kept running past him to first, and only, base and then back home. We inevitably lost and our (random dream) coach was pissed. I asked him why we played on a partial field and he didn't answer.

Then I was at a ballpark watching the Brewers play the Astros/Cubs as the opponent switched back an forth. The Brewers were ahead. The ballpark looked like it could hold maybe 5,000 people and most of the stands were behind the outfield.

Then I was at my old elementary school in Sun Prairie. There was an evil(?) black car about two feet long and a good red convertible one. Then Lady Gaga was being interviewed while sitting on the red car. She had dark hair that looked like a wig but didn't turn out to be one. She didn't look like the real Lady Gaga. Then some evil spirit told the black car to stop and got out a truck with a back hoe although the back how looked more like a clamping digger. The truck then trenched around the playground looking for a body. Then I was in the car with Lady Gaga chasing the black truck to stop it. We ran it over a few times and then headed off to South America.

Busking in Paris

I was riding in the back of a transport truck through Paris after it was liberated in WWII.  I pointed out to the people in the truck that all these buildings were rigged to explode, but the Germans never destroyed them.  I noticed that some of the buildings had their facades blown off.

Then I was by a bridge.  The bridge went over a courtyard below to a romantic style building.  I was busking with some guy on drums and a woman on bass.  I played the guitar and was trying to get a harder sound from everyone.  I wanted to be the a pioneer in rock and roll, about ten  years early.

I was in the same courtyard, but it had a large dirigible in the middle and buildings built into the walls.  All of this was for people about 1/10 the size of me.  Then Superman and Batman were defending it against aliens.  The aliens made all these plants grow.  The rest is fuzzy.  Then I was walking along some catwalks in a bombed out building.  I was still trying to be a  pioneer in rock and roll.  Part of the building was a school hallway with lockers.  I was mad that the record labels were not happy with my sound so I decided to start my own label.

Then the building was part marsh and I was walking through it.  There were two skeletons about 12" high playing some tune.  I knew them when they worked at a grocery store so I walked up and talked to them.

In L.A.

So last night I drove to LA with Shaun. We met up with Shari and Michael and hung out on some hill. I don't remember much about this part.

The next part, the four of us plus my father were heading to some Disney attraction. We went down in the elevator into a large dimly lit room. A 18" raised state was in the middle of the room with a drum set on it. CC Deville, with his fluffy white hair, from Poison sat at the drums, which is funny since he plays guitar. A woman came out to sing and I asked Shari who it was. She knew, but I forget the name, and said she wanted to move over by the dance floor so Sophie could dance. I waved my father over, but he wanted to sit on a bench instead of the floor.

Then Poison came on and played "Talk Dirty To Me". I followed my father over to the doors. We waited and when it was done, the Disney experience continued. The doors opened and we were running through an obstical course made up of fiber glass rock. Fake machine gunners shot at us as fireworks or something popped at us. That hurt. I climbed up a, um, hill and hid.

The next part I as queuing to get on a train. I was in the line to get in, but needed to get a ticket using my credit card. I moved into another line to buy a ticket and found I was in another line to get in. Then I went to be the back of the line and eventually got my ticket. When I got in, some guy walked over, picked up part of the train and threw it into the desert. He kept picking up parts of the train and throwing them. I ran into the desert to make sure my friends were ok.

Then I was driving back with Shaun and had to do my homework. That sucked the most.

Would You Like A Puppy With That

McDonald's was doing a promotion where you could get a free pet if you spent a dollar. I was horrified by this and bought four items and received a dog, a parrot, and two other animals. I then stressed out on how to take care of them. I decided to take them to the Humane Society and give a monetary donation. The dream didn't take me that far.

I also was in a close-out store in a mall with Shaun and Molly. I couldn't find anything that I liked. I thought I would find a good shirt or something, but no. The next space over was empty and cavernous. They used to sell tv's and such and I remember them from an old dream. The other part was in it, too, but wasn't a close-out store then.

Muddled Mess

I can't put a narrative my dreams last night, so here's the corporate solution: Bullet Points!

- I was talking to my maternal grandfather.
- Jake "the Snake" Roberts was wrestling Hulk Hogan. He pile drived him on some big cushion thing a few times, then on the regular mat. He got his snake out, too.
- Kids were all facinated by the snake and ran over there. Jake put the snake back in the carrying case and some little midget kit was in there with a helmet and a battle axe.
- There was some South Park episode to do with Star Wars.
- I was in a valley, trying to solve a murder. It was more like a game than an investigation. I caught the murderer because she gave me an improbable travel time.
- A gun fight broke out between (I think) mercenaries and hunters. I had to slide down some mud into Chicago (all twenty square feet of it). I learned that 3 million of Chicago's residents lived on a boat in the lake.

So there you have it.

Chattanooga

This morning at about 4 am, I was married to a Chinese woman who was getting her masters degree somewhere. We lived in Chattanooga. We talked about the auto industry next to this man-made slope. She then cooked dinner for the two of us.

Then I was in some apartment with wooden floors that had just been refinished. A party started, then I woke up.

Bells

So last night in my dream, I got married... to a guy. I was happy and all, but not interesting in consumating it. I also was in some sociology class and was carrying my tv with me.

So be it.

Damn Depressing Movie

So I watched the Wrestler last night, a very good, but depressing movie. So of course my dreams were all fucked up. I remember that Mickey Rourke had a pet spider, but it was covered in a ball of dust, twigs, and other shit. He had to put it somewhere for the spider to come out. The Wonder Bread man made an appearance, but he was supposed to be some hipster and his presence was really special. Then I was with Shari, Michael, and Amanda. We walked past a couple of dead, bloody cows in the road and I worried what Sophie would think.

Can't remember much more.

The Red Coats Are Coming!

This is what I remember: there was some big dinosaur, but only a partial skeleton. It would shit and I'd have to avoid it. I guess when I slept (the dream me) I would have to fight and avoid Revolutionary War-era British soldiers. Then there was part of it in a big warehouse store like Costco and I would be whipped over to the field and slide down a hill.

Yep, that's it. I'm sure at 4:23 in the morning I would have had a better narrative or at least would have been able to fully understand what I just wrote, but I was to lazy to get out of bed.

Saint Christopher

I can't remember why and I can't remember what happened afterward, but I was walking away from some banquet room, holding a religious trinket and yelling "It's Saint Christopher! You know why I have it!?! It's because he's not real!"

Disect it as you will.

Vive le Fermier Français

I had a dream last night where I was a French farmer returning home after World War II. Um, for some reason I was up in a tree for part of the war. Anyway, my farm was outside Paris on a slightly sloped piece of land by a river. Over the years, Paris expanded to surround my farm, but I wouldn't sell. I ended up with about a ten foot patch between two three-story buildings with my land running behind those buildings too.

Elections

The only part of my disjointed dream that I remember is holding onto my old iguana, Melvyn. There was some sort of grate with an opening in it. I put Melvyn into it and he almost fell into the lava in there. Thankfully he didn't because he was running for Prime Minister.

Ba-Dum Pssshhhh

I can't remember much except I was playing drums with BBG on the Union Terrace. Neither of us were particularly good although I was much worse than she was. I couldn't keep a beat and had no idea how to play any songs. The crowd seemed disinterested.

Another part I was trying to find my dorm room. The halls were narrow and the doors were tall.

Another part I had to go to church. I saw Shaun there and he didn't have to go even though he was the pastor's son. I was pissed about that.

A Jumbled Mess

I'll try to remember this one coherently but I promise nothing.

One part I was in my neighbor's basement. Tom was there, but I'm not sure who the others were. Tom had a hug bag of heroin. He threw it to me and it busted open. I licked off the powder from my index finger and Tom said to be careful because it isn't cut. I went outside and someone came up to me and asked if I spoke French. I said in French that I didn't. Then I was surrounded by the people he was helping. A couple spoke Turkish and a couple spoke French. Maybe some spoke German. I tried to help them, but then yelled "QUIET!" I believe I yelled that in reality, too.

Then I was in some Death Star kind of place. I know I was killing storm troopers and going in and out of elevators. The center of the place was open, so I was hanging on to keep from falling. Then Trapjaw was there and turned on the storm troppers because he was in love with some girl on my side. I guess she gave him a new set of teeth.

Then part of if was where I was putting on plays. Shari found it funny that I made Tara sing "Dancing Queen". Brendon gave me a bag with half a bagel and cream cheese. Then I was watching Shari's play in some big Orpheum-like auditorium. Then somehow I was dead, but a seat was always saved for me. So I showed up, but everyone said it was saved for a dead guy. Then I showed them my library card and said that I was that dead guy. Then for some reason the whole deal moved to the new Yankee Stadium. I was happy that I could watch a ton of baseball each year, but still wore my Brewer's shirt. Then the Brewers were playing the Yankees in the World Series and some of us stood up and cheered.