Snippet:
TIME PASSES and MORE INDIE ROCK MUSIC PLAYS. ELLEN
goes through the various scenes that movies about pregnant
people are obligated to include.
She visits JASON BATEMAN.
JASON BATEMAN
Hey Ellen. Want to watch some indie horror films and listen to some indie music together?
ELLEN PAGE
That sounds great! I sure hope that watching the movie isn't interrupted by me having to go puke my guts out, sweaty and hunched over the toilet.
(pause)
Just kidding, none of that crap happens in the movie. Pregnancy is easy-peasy.
JASON BATEMAN
Well, I have good news. I'm leaving Jennifer Garner.
ELLEN PAGE
Why, because your marriage to her has robbed you of your youth, which you have been reminded of since you started hanging around with me?
JASON BATEMAN
No, I just rented 13 Going On 30. I can't even look at her now. Has she been in anything good?
ELLEN PAGE
Oh. Because if it was the other thing, then you could take notice of the fact that I remind you of your younger days despite the fact that my current predicament requires a level of maturity far beyond my years, and you could enjoy the contrast between our situations that is ironically illustrated by having us both get along so well.
JASON BATEMAN
How artistic!
ELLEN PAGE
You're goddamn right it is! Bring on the Oscars!
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